Two and a Half Men Episodes
Two and a Half Men has 262 episodes over 12 seasons. The show premiered on September 22, 2003 and the latest episode aired on February 19, 2015. Two and a Half Men has ended, running for a total of 11 years. Dive in below for a detailed list of each season, including episode air dates and titles.
Season 1 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 22, 2003
S1 : E1
Pilot
Sep 29, 2003
S1 : E2
Big Flappy Bastards
Oct 06, 2003
S1 : E3
Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell
Oct 13, 2003
S1 : E4
If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song I'm Going to Take a Nap
Oct 20, 2003
S1 : E5
The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump
Oct 27, 2003
S1 : E6
Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?
Nov 03, 2003
S1 : E7
If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake
Nov 10, 2003
S1 : E8
Twenty-Five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful
Nov 17, 2003
S1 : E9
Phase One, Complete
Nov 24, 2003
S1 : E10
Merry Thanksgiving
Dec 15, 2003
S1 : E11
Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor
Jan 05, 2004
S1 : E12
Camel Filters + Pheromones
Jan 12, 2004
S1 : E13
Sarah Like Puny Alan
Feb 02, 2004
S1 : E14
I Can't Afford Hyenas
Feb 09, 2004
S1 : E15
Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick (1)
Feb 16, 2004
S1 : E16
That Was Saliva, Alan (2)
Feb 23, 2004
S1 : E17
Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats
Mar 01, 2004
S1 : E18
An Old Flame with a New Wick
Mar 22, 2004
S1 : E19
I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You
Apr 19, 2004
S1 : E20
Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark
May 03, 2004
S1 : E21
No Sniffing, No Wowing
May 10, 2004
S1 : E22
My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet
May 17, 2004
S1 : E23
Just Like Buffalo
May 24, 2004
S1 : E24
Can You Feel My Finger?
Season 2 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 20, 2004
S2 : E1
Back Off, Mary Poppins
Sep 27, 2004
S2 : E2
Enjoy Those Garlic Balls
Oct 04, 2004
S2 : E3
A Bag Full of Jawea
Oct 11, 2004
S2 : E4
Go Get Mommy's Bra
Oct 18, 2004
S2 : E5
Bad News from the Clinic?
Oct 25, 2004
S2 : E6
The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance
Nov 08, 2004
S2 : E7
A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana
Nov 15, 2004
S2 : E8
Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers
Nov 22, 2004
S2 : E9
Yes, Monsignor
Nov 29, 2004
S2 : E10
The Salmon Under My Sweater
Dec 13, 2004
S2 : E11
Last Chance to See Those Tattoos
Jan 03, 2005
S2 : E12
A Lung Full of Alan
Jan 17, 2005
S2 : E13
Zejdz Zmoich Wlosow
Jan 31, 2005
S2 : E14
Those Big Pink Things with Coconuts
Feb 07, 2005
S2 : E15
Smell the Umbrella Stand
Feb 14, 2005
S2 : E16
Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth?
Feb 21, 2005
S2 : E17
Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!
Mar 07, 2005
S2 : E18
It was 'Mame,' Mom
Mar 21, 2005
S2 : E19
A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise
Apr 18, 2005
S2 : E20
I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey
May 02, 2005
S2 : E21
A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On
May 09, 2005
S2 : E22
That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother
May 16, 2005
S2 : E23
Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab
May 23, 2005
S2 : E24
Does This Smell Funny to You?
Season 3 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 19, 2005
S3 : E1
Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts
Sep 26, 2005
S3 : E2
Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
Oct 03, 2005
S3 : E3
Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
Oct 10, 2005
S3 : E4
Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs
Oct 17, 2005
S3 : E5
We Called It Mr. Pinky
Oct 24, 2005
S3 : E6
Hi, Mr. Horned One
Nov 07, 2005
S3 : E7
Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop
Nov 14, 2005
S3 : E8
That Voodoo That I Do Do
Nov 21, 2005
S3 : E9
Madame and Her Special Friend
Nov 28, 2005
S3 : E10
Something Salted and Twisted
Dec 19, 2005
S3 : E11
Santa's Village of the Damned
Jan 09, 2006
S3 : E12
That Special Tug
Jan 23, 2006
S3 : E13
Humiliation Is a Visual Medium
Feb 06, 2006
S3 : E14
Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded
Feb 27, 2006
S3 : E15
My Tongue Is Meat
Mar 06, 2006
S3 : E16
Ergo, the Booty Call
Mar 13, 2006
S3 : E17
The Unfortunate Little Schnauser
Mar 20, 2006
S3 : E18
The Spit-Covered Cobbler
Apr 10, 2006
S3 : E19
Golly Moses, She's a Muffin
Apr 24, 2006
S3 : E20
Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro
May 01, 2006
S3 : E21
And the Plot Moistens
May 08, 2006
S3 : E22
Just Once with Aunt Sophie
May 15, 2006
S3 : E23
Arguments for the Quickie
May 22, 2006
S3 : E24
That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite
Season 4 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 18, 2006
S4 : E1
Working for Caligula
Sep 25, 2006
S4 : E2
Who's Vod Kanockers?
Oct 02, 2006
S4 : E3
The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress
Oct 09, 2006
S4 : E4
A Pot Smoking Monkey
Oct 16, 2006
S4 : E5
A Live Woman of Proven Fertility
Oct 23, 2006
S4 : E6
Apologies for the Frivolity
Nov 06, 2006
S4 : E7
Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head
Nov 13, 2006
S4 : E8
Release the Dogs
Nov 20, 2006
S4 : E9
Corey's Been Dead for an Hour
Nov 27, 2006
S4 : E10
Kissing Abraham Lincoln
Dec 11, 2006
S4 : E11
Walnuts and Demerol
Jan 08, 2007
S4 : E12
Castrating Sheep in Montana
Jan 22, 2007
S4 : E13
Don't Worry, Speed Racer
Feb 05, 2007
S4 : E14
That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami
Feb 12, 2007
S4 : E15
My Damn Stalker
Feb 19, 2007
S4 : E16
Young People Have Phlegm Too
Feb 26, 2007
S4 : E17
I Merely Slept with a Commie
Mar 19, 2007
S4 : E18
It Never Rains in Hooterville
Apr 09, 2007
S4 : E19
Smooth As a Ken Doll
Apr 16, 2007
S4 : E20
Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot
Apr 23, 2007
S4 : E21
Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous
Apr 30, 2007
S4 : E22
Mr. McGlue's Feedbag
May 07, 2007
S4 : E23
Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-lookin
May 14, 2007
S4 : E24
Prostitutes and Gelato
Season 5 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 24, 2007
S5 : E1
Large Birds, Spiders and Mom
Oct 01, 2007
S5 : E2
Media Room Slash Dungeon
Oct 08, 2007
S5 : E3
Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo
Oct 15, 2007
S5 : E4
City of Great Racks
Oct 22, 2007
S5 : E5
Putting Swim Fins on a Cat
Oct 29, 2007
S5 : E6
Help Daddy Find His Toenail
Nov 05, 2007
S5 : E7
Our Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room
Nov 12, 2007
S5 : E8
Is There a Mrs. Waffles?
Nov 19, 2007
S5 : E9
Tight's Good
Nov 26, 2007
S5 : E10
Kinda Like Necrophilia
Mar 17, 2008
S5 : E11
Meander to Your Dander
Mar 24, 2008
S5 : E12
A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh
Mar 31, 2008
S5 : E13
The Soil Is Moist
Apr 14, 2008
S5 : E14
Winky-Dink Time
Apr 21, 2008
S5 : E15
Rough Night in Hump Junction
Apr 28, 2008
S5 : E16
Look at Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty
May 05, 2008
S5 : E17
Fish in a Drawer
May 12, 2008
S5 : E18
If My Hole Could Talk
May 19, 2008
S5 : E19
Waiting for the Right Snapper
Season 6 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 22, 2008
S6 : E1
Taterhead Is Our Love Child
Sep 29, 2008
S6 : E2
Pie Hole, Herb
Oct 06, 2008
S6 : E3
Damn You, Eggs Benedict
Oct 13, 2008
S6 : E4
The Flavin' and the Mavin'
Oct 20, 2008
S6 : E5
A Jock Strap in Hell
Nov 03, 2008
S6 : E6
It's Always Nazi Week
Nov 10, 2008
S6 : E7
Best H.O. Money Can Buy
Nov 17, 2008
S6 : E8
Pinocchio's Mouth
Nov 24, 2008
S6 : E9
The Mooch at the Boo
Dec 08, 2008
S6 : E10
He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited
Dec 15, 2008
S6 : E11
The Devil's Lube
Jan 12, 2009
S6 : E12
Thank God for Scoliosis
Jan 19, 2009
S6 : E13
I Think You Offended Don
Feb 02, 2009
S6 : E14
David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie
Feb 09, 2009
S6 : E15
I'd Like to Start with the Cat
Mar 02, 2009
S6 : E16
She'll Still Be Dead at Halftime
Mar 09, 2009
S6 : E17
The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?
Mar 16, 2009
S6 : E18
My Son's Enormous Head
Mar 30, 2009
S6 : E19
The Two Finger Rule
Apr 13, 2009
S6 : E20
Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau
Apr 27, 2009
S6 : E21
Above Exalted Cyclops
May 04, 2009
S6 : E22
Sir Lancelot's Litter Box
May 11, 2009
S6 : E23
Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth
May 18, 2009
S6 : E24
Baseball with Better Steroids
Season 7 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 21, 2009
S7 : E1
818-jklpuzo
Sep 28, 2009
S7 : E2
Whipped Unto the Third Generation
Oct 05, 2009
S7 : E3
Mmm, Fish. Yum.
Oct 12, 2009
S7 : E4
Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator
Oct 19, 2009
S7 : E5
For the Sake of the Child
Nov 02, 2009
S7 : E6
Give Me Your Thumb
Nov 09, 2009
S7 : E7
Untainted by Filth
Nov 16, 2009
S7 : E8
Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.
Nov 23, 2009
S7 : E9
Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair
Dec 07, 2009
S7 : E10
That's Why They Call It Ball Room
Dec 14, 2009
S7 : E11
Warning, It's Dirty
Jan 11, 2010
S7 : E12
Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste
Jan 18, 2010
S7 : E13
Yay, No Polyps!
Feb 01, 2010
S7 : E14
Crude and Uncalled For
Feb 08, 2010
S7 : E15
Aye, Aye, Captain
Mar 01, 2010
S7 : E16
Tinkle Like a Princess
Mar 08, 2010
S7 : E17
I Found Your Moustache
Mar 22, 2010
S7 : E18
Ixnay on the Oggie Day
Apr 12, 2010
S7 : E19
Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave
May 10, 2010
S7 : E20
I Called Him Magoo
May 17, 2010
S7 : E21
Gumby with a Pokey
May 24, 2010
S7 : E22
This Is Not Gonna End Well
Season 8 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 20, 2010
S8 : E1
Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud
Sep 27, 2010
S8 : E2
A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer
Oct 04, 2010
S8 : E3
A Pudding-Filled Cactus
Oct 11, 2010
S8 : E4
Hookers, Hookers, Hookers
Oct 18, 2010
S8 : E5
The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel
Oct 25, 2010
S8 : E6
Twanging Your Magic Clanger
Nov 01, 2010
S8 : E7
The Crazy Bitch Gazette
Nov 08, 2010
S8 : E8
Springtime on a Stick
Nov 15, 2010
S8 : E9
A Good Time in Central Africa
Nov 22, 2010
S8 : E10
Ow, Ow, Don't Stop
Dec 06, 2010
S8 : E11
Dead from the Waist Down
Dec 13, 2010
S8 : E12
Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead
Jan 03, 2011
S8 : E13
Skunk, Dog, Crap and Ketchup
Jan 17, 2011
S8 : E14
Lookin' for Japanese Subs
Feb 07, 2011
S8 : E15
Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak
Feb 14, 2011
S8 : E16
That Darn Priest
Season 9 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 19, 2011
S9 : E1
Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
Sep 26, 2011
S9 : E2
People Who Love Peepholes
Oct 03, 2011
S9 : E3
Big Girls Don't Throw Food
Oct 10, 2011
S9 : E4
Nine Magic Fingers
Oct 17, 2011
S9 : E5
A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
Oct 24, 2011
S9 : E6
The Squat and the Hover
Oct 31, 2011
S9 : E7
Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
Nov 07, 2011
S9 : E8
Thank You for the Intercourse
Nov 14, 2011
S9 : E9
Frodo's Headshots
Nov 21, 2011
S9 : E10
A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
Dec 05, 2011
S9 : E11
What a Lovely Landing Strip
Dec 12, 2011
S9 : E12
One False Move, Zimbabwe!
Jan 02, 2012
S9 : E13
Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
Jan 16, 2012
S9 : E14
A Possum on Chemo
Feb 06, 2012
S9 : E15
The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
Feb 13, 2012
S9 : E16
Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
Feb 20, 2012
S9 : E17
Not in My Mouth!
Feb 27, 2012
S9 : E18
The War Against Gingivitis
Mar 19, 2012
S9 : E19
Palmdale, Ech
Apr 09, 2012
S9 : E20
Grandma's Pie
Apr 16, 2012
S9 : E21
Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'
Apr 30, 2012
S9 : E22
Why We Gave Up Women
May 07, 2012
S9 : E23
The Straw in My Donut Hole
May 14, 2012
S9 : E24
Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
Season 10 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 27, 2012
S10 : E1
I Changed My Mind About the Milk
Oct 04, 2012
S10 : E2
A Big Bag of Dog
Oct 11, 2012
S10 : E3
Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt
Oct 18, 2012
S10 : E4
You Do Know What the Lollipop's For
Oct 25, 2012
S10 : E5
That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam
Nov 01, 2012
S10 : E6
Ferrets, Attack!
Nov 08, 2012
S10 : E7
Avoid the Chinese Mustard
Nov 15, 2012
S10 : E8
Something My Gynecologist Said
Nov 29, 2012
S10 : E9
I Scream When I Pee
Dec 06, 2012
S10 : E10
One Nut Johnson
Dec 13, 2012
S10 : E11
Give Santa a Tail-Hole
Jan 03, 2013
S10 : E12
Welcome to Alancrest
Jan 10, 2013
S10 : E13
Grab a Feather and Get in Line
Jan 31, 2013
S10 : E14
Run, Steven Staven! Run!
Feb 07, 2013
S10 : E15
Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It
Feb 14, 2013
S10 : E16
Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby
Feb 21, 2013
S10 : E17
Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries
Mar 07, 2013
S10 : E18
The 9:04 from Pemberton
Mar 14, 2013
S10 : E19
Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon
Apr 04, 2013
S10 : E20
Bazinga! That's from a TV Show
Apr 25, 2013
S10 : E21
Another Night with Neil Diamond
May 02, 2013
S10 : E22
My Bodacious Vidalia
May 09, 2013
S10 : E23
Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped
Season 11 - Two and a Half Men
Sep 26, 2013
S11 : E1
Nangnangnangnang
Oct 03, 2013
S11 : E2
I Think I Banged Lucille Ball
Oct 10, 2013
S11 : E3
This Unblessed Biscuit
Oct 17, 2013
S11 : E4
Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank
Oct 24, 2013
S11 : E5
Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003
Nov 07, 2013
S11 : E6
Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants
Nov 14, 2013
S11 : E7
Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie
Nov 21, 2013
S11 : E8
Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.
Dec 05, 2013
S11 : E9
Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer
Dec 12, 2013
S11 : E10
On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer!
Jan 02, 2014
S11 : E11
Tazed in the Lady Nuts
Jan 09, 2014
S11 : E12
Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.
Jan 30, 2014
S11 : E13
Bite Me, Supreme Court
Feb 06, 2014
S11 : E14
Three Fingers of Crème de Menthe
Feb 27, 2014
S11 : E15
Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin
Mar 06, 2014
S11 : E16
How to Get Rid of Alan Harper
Mar 13, 2014
S11 : E17
Welcome Home, Jake
Apr 03, 2014
S11 : E18
West Side Story
Apr 10, 2014
S11 : E19
Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang
Apr 24, 2014
S11 : E20
Lotta Delis in Little Armenia
May 01, 2014
S11 : E21
Dial 1-900-Mix-a-Lot
May 08, 2014
S11 : E22
Oh WALD-E, Good Times Ahead
Season 12 - Two and a Half Men
Oct 30, 2014
S12 : E1
The Ol' Mexican Spinach
Nov 06, 2014
S12 : E2
A Chic Bar in Ibiza
Nov 13, 2014
S12 : E3
Glamping in a Yurt
Nov 20, 2014
S12 : E4
Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight
Nov 27, 2014
S12 : E5
Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.
Dec 04, 2014
S12 : E6
Alan Shot a Little Girl
Dec 11, 2014
S12 : E7
Sex with an Animated Ed Asner
Dec 18, 2014
S12 : E8
Family, Bublé, Deep-fried Turkey
Jan 08, 2015
S12 : E9
Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey
Jan 15, 2015
S12 : E10
Here I Come, Pants!
Jan 22, 2015
S12 : E11
For Whom the Booty Calls
Jan 29, 2015
S12 : E12
A Beer-Battered Rip-Off
Feb 05, 2015
S12 : E13
Boompa Loved His Hookers
Feb 12, 2015
S12 : E14
Don't Give a Monkey a Gun
Feb 19, 2015
S12 : E15
Of Course He's Dead - Part One
Feb 19, 2015
S12 : E16
Of Course He's Dead - Part Two
How many seasons of Two and a Half Men are there?
There have been a total of 12 seasons of Two and a Half Men.
How many episodes of Two and a Half Men are there?
There are 262 episodes of Two and a Half Men. Each Two and a Half Men season averages a total of 21 episodes.
Is Two and a Half Men over?
Yes, Two and a Half Men is not longer in production and has completed its run.
