Season 1
1.
Pilot
2.
Rockets, Communists, and the Dewey Decimal System
3.
Poker, Faith, and Eggs
4.
A Therapist, a Comic Book, and a Breakfast Sausage
5.
A Solar Calculator, a Game Ball, and a Cheerleader's Bosom
6.
A Patch, a Modem, and a Zantac
7.
A Brisket, Voodoo, and Cannonball Run
8.
Cape Canaveral, Schrödinger's Cat, and Cyndi Lauper's Hair
9.
Spock, Kirk, and Testicular Hernia
10.
An Eagle Feather, a String Bean, and an Eskimo
11.
Demons, Sunday School, and Prime Numbers
12.
A Computer, a Plastic Pony, and a Case of Beer
13.
A Sneeze, Detention, and Sissy Spacek
14.
Potato Salad, a Broomstick, and Dad's Whiskey
15.
Dolomite, Apple Slices, and a Mystery Woman
16.
Killer Asteroids, Oklahoma, and a Frizzy Hair Machine
17.
Jiu-Jitsu, Bubble Wrap, and Yoo-hoo
18.
A Mother, A Child, and a Blue Man's Backside
19.
Gluons, Guacamole, and the Color Purple
20.
A Dog, a Squirrel, and a Fish Named Fish
21.
Summer Sausage, a Pocket Poncho, and Tony Danza
22.
Vanilla Ice Cream, Gentleman Callers, and a Dinette Set
Season 2
1.
A High-Pitched Buzz and Training Wheels
2.
A Rival Prodigy and Sir Isaac Neutron
3.
A Crisis of Faith and Octopus Aliens
4.
A Financial Secret and Fish Sauce
5.
A Research Study and Czechoslovakian Wedding Pastries
6.
Seven Deadly Sins and a Small Carl Sagan
7.
Carbon Dating and a Stuffed Raccoon
8.
An 8-Bit Princess and a Flat Tire Genius
9.
Family Dynamics and a Red Fiero
10.
A Stunted Childhood and a Can of Fancy Mixed Nuts
11.
A Race of Superhumans and a Letter to Alf
12.
A Tummy Ache and a Whale of a Metaphor
13.
A Nuclear Reactor and a Boy Called Lovely
14.
David, Goliath and a Yoo-hoo from the Back
15.
A Math Emergency and Perky Palms
16.
A Loaf of Bread and a Grand Old Flag
17.
Albert Einstein and the Story of Another Mary
18.
A Perfect Score and a Bunsen Burner Marshmallow
19.
A Political Campaign and a Candy Land Cheater
20.
A Proposal and a Popsicle Stick Cross
21.
A Broken Heart and a Crock Monster
22.
A Swedish Science Thing and the Equation for Toast
Season 3
1.
Quirky Eggheads and Texas Snow Globes
2.
A Broom Closet and Satan's Monopoly Board
3.
An Entrepreneurialist and a Swat on the Bottom
4.
Hobbitses, Physicses and a Ball with Zip
5.
A Pineapple and the Bosom of Male Friendship
6.
A Parasol and a Hell of an Arm
7.
Pongo Pygmaeus and a Culture that Encourages Spitting
8.
The Sin of Greed and a Chimichanga from Chi-chi's
9.
A Party Invitation, Football Grapes and an Earth Chicken
10.
Teenager Soup and a Little Ball of Fib
11.
A Live Chicken, a Fried Chicken and Holy Matrimony
12.
Body Glitter and a Mall Safety Kit
13.
Contracts, Rules and a Little Bit of Pig Brains
14.
A Slump, a Cross and Roadside Gravel
15.
A Boyfriend's Ex-Wife and a Good Luck Head Rub
16.
Pasadena
17.
An Academic Crime and a More Romantic Taco Bell
18.
A Couple Bruised Ribs and a Cereal Box Ghost Detector
19.
A House for Sale and Serious Woman Stuff
20.
A Baby Tooth and the Egyptian God of Knowledge
21.
A Secret Letter and a Lowly Disc of Processed Meat
Season 4
1.
Graduation
2.
A Docent, A Little Lady and a Bouncer Named Dalton
3.
Training Wheels and an Unleashed Chicken
4.
Bible Camp and a Chariot of Love
5.
A Musty Crypt and a Stick to Pee On
6.
Freshman Orientation and the Inventor of The Zipper
7.
A Philosophy Class and Worms That Can Chase You
8.
An Existential Crisis and a Bear That Makes Bubbles
9.
Crappy Frozen Ice Cream and an Organ Grinder's Monkey
10.
Cowboy Aerobics and 473 Grease-Free Bolts
11.
A Pager, a Club and a Cranky Bag of Wrinkles
12.
A Box of Treasure and the Meemaw of Science
13.
The Geezer Bus and a New Model for Education
14.
Mitch's Son and the Unconditional Approval of a Government Agency
15.
A Virus, Heartbreak and a World of Possibilities
16.
A Second Prodigy and the Hottest Tips for Pouty Lips
17.
A Black Hole
18.
The Wild and Woolly World of Nonlinear Dynamics
Season 5
1.
One Bad Night and Chaos of Selfish Desires
2.
Snoopin' Around and the Wonder Twins of Atheism
3.
Potential Energy and Hooch on a Park Bench
4.
Pish Posh and a Secret Back Room
5.
Stuffed Animals and a Sweet Southern Syzygy
6.
Money Laundering and a Cascade of Hormones
7.
An Introduction to Engineering and a Glob of Hair Gel
8.
The Grand Chancellor and a Den of Sin
9.
The Yips and an Oddly Hypnotic Bohemian
10.
An Expensive Glitch and a Goof-Off Room
11.
A Lock-In, a Weather Girl and a Disgusting Habit
12.
A Pink Cadillac and a Glorious Tribal Dance
13.
A Lot of Band-Aids and the Cooper Surrender
14.
A Free Scratcher and Feminine Wiles
15.
A Lobster, an Armadillo and a Way Bigger Number
16.
A Suitcase Full of Cash and a Yellow Clown Car
17.
A Solo Peanut, a Social Butterfly and the Truth
18.
Babies, Lies and a Resplendent Cannoli
19.
A God-Fearin' Baptist and a Hot Trophy Husband
20.
Uncle Sheldon and a Hormonal Firecracker
21.
White Trash, Holy Rollers and Punching People
22.
Clogged Pore, a Little Spanish and the Future
Season 6
1.
Four Hundred Cartons of Undeclared Cigarettes and a Niblingo
2.
Future Worf and the Margarita of the South Pacific
3.
Passion's Harvest and a Sheldocracy
4.
Blonde Ambition and the Concept of Zero
5.
A Resident Advisor and the Word 'Sketchy'
6.
An Ugly Car, an Affair and Some Kickass Football
7.
A Tougher Nut and a Note on File
8.
Legalese and a Whole Hoo-Ha
9.
College Dropouts and the Medford Miracle
10.
Pancake Sunday and Textbook Flirting
11.
Ruthless, Toothless and a Week of Bed Rest
12.
A Baby Shower and a Testosterone-Rich Banter
13.
A Frat Party, a Sleepover and the Mother of All Blisters
14.
A Launch Party and a Whole Human Being
15.
Teen Angst and a Smart-Boy Walk of Shame
16.
A Stolen Truck and Going on the Lam
17.
A German Folk Song and an Actual Adult
18.
Little Green Men and a Fella's Marriage Proposal
19.
A New Weather Girl and a Stay-at-Home Coddler
20.
German for Beginners and a Crazy Old Man with a Bat
21.
A Romantic Getaway and a Germanic Meat-Based Diet
22.
A Tornado, a 10-Hour Flight and a Darn Fine Ring
Season 7
1.
A Wiener Schnitzel and Underwear in a Tree
2.
A Roulette Wheel and a Piano Playing Dog
3.
A Strudel and a Hot American Boy Toy
4.
Ants on a Log and a Cheating Winker
5.
A Frankenstein's Monster and a Crazy Church Guy
6.
Baptists, Catholics and an Attempted Drowning
7.
A Proper Wedding and Skeletons in the Closet
8.
An Ankle Monitor and a Big Plastic Crap House
9.
A Fancy Article and a Scholarship for a Baby
10.
Community Service and the Key to a Happy Marriage
11.
A Little Snip and Teaching Old Dogs
12.
A New Home and a Traditional Texas Torture
13.
Funeral (1)
14.
Memoir (2)

